BPF Dissed, Defended, and Donné La Croix de Guerre

Nathan of Polybloggimous, who originally pushed for the LOLfish in spite of my suggestion that a fish, especially an old fish like Big Pink Fishie, might be difficult to catch on camera doing anything particularly funny, saw my LOLfish and posted this on his blog:

“And I’ll now agree that a 400-year-old fish (in fish years), is not all that inspirational.

“He floats. He floats. (Does he do anything else?) No.

“He floats. But he’s LOL. Can’t you tell?

“Yes, we can move on.”

Prompted by Mrs. Unfocused, I lept to the defense of our family pet on his comments page:

Nathan –

First, thanks for the shout out, and the certificate of compliance. I intend to print it out and have it framed. I will hang it near the fish tank.

I must take issue, however, with your characterization of Big Pink Fishie as “not inspirational.” In my original comment, I said that, as a 400-year-old fish (in fish years), BPF is not funny, not prone to wacky, camera-friendly antics. But not inspirational? We got BPF in 1990. There are kids buying beer with fake IDs younger than this fish. It has lived through four moves, a three-day blackout in 95-degree heat, multiple illnesses, and various other mishaps that have killed every other fish we’ve ever had. Big Pink Fishie keeps on keeping on.

Sure, all he does is float. Who has a better right?

Damn right he’s inspirational. When I’m 400 years old, I don’t plan to be all that funny, either.

Sorry for the rant. I had to defend the honor of my fish.

I have to say, Nathan owned up to his error. He has awarded BPF the Croix de Guerre, which, I think, completely makes up for saying that the Fishmeister is not inspirational. For some reason, Nathan’s old logo is loading in the comments here instead of his new one, so when you think of Nathan, please think of Jack-Jack from the Incredibles.

Now that BPF is acknowledged as a hero, I can tell you all a secret: BPF has psychic powers of mind control.

Here’s proof: many times, I have gone down to the basement and found the fish food can open, food spilled all around the tank and half of the contents of the can floating on top of the water, BPF happily pecking at it from below. My son, Unfocused Junior, is invariably standing nearby, hands covered with Tetramin flakes. When I ask him what happened, he answers, “It was time to feed Big Pink Fishie, Daddy!”

Time to feed Big Pink Fishie indeed.


4 responses to “BPF Dissed, Defended, and Donné La Croix de Guerre

  1. Unfocused,

    Your links don’t work in the comments section. They’re too long and run off the edge of the page. May I pass on some tricks a Whatever reader shared with me?

    First, you can make a URL shorter at Tiny URL.com

    Second, Use
    (a href=”http://www.example.com”>texty stuff</a) to create the Link.

    1.replace the parentheses with . I had to use parentheses so wordpress wouldn’t tell me I was using a bad link.

    2. paste the URL you are linking (i.e. http://blah blah) between the quotation marks.)

    3. replace “texty stuff” with whatever words you want to show up and be the link.

    Feel free to delete this comment.

  2. But if I deleted it, I would never remember how to do it. Many thanks for the tip!

  3. Where it says to replace the parentheses, it left out the “less than” symbol at the beginning and “greater than” at the end. That should work.

  4. Pingback: “Siren, j’accuse!” « The Siren, Syncopated

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